时间:2025-04-26 17:48:45 来源:网络整理编辑:休閑
Sean Spicer resigned as the White House's Communications Director on July 21, proving many analysts'
Sean Spicer resigned as the White House's Communications Director on July 21, proving many analysts' predictions correct.
Spicer's legacy, a seemingly endless string of flubs and mistakes in just six months, will surely live on long after the Trump administration is out of power.
SEE ALSO:Why Sean Spicer is actually a geniusLike many businesses, the White House HR department conducts exit interviews with departing employees. We've been lucky enough to receive the transcript for Mr. Spicer's, and have published it below:
First thing's first, I was never told I would have to be on camera. When I was hired, President Trump called me and asked if I would "do communications for [him]." That's an exact quote. I said sure, I can answer phones or help set up Skype calls or whatever. So I come in on day one wearing board shorts and a T-shirt and Reince Priebus stops me in the hallway and says, "Hey dipshit, you're on camera in four minutes, what in god's name are you wearing?" I was like, "On camera for what?" And he goes, "For the President, you stupid idiot" and I was like, "I'm terrified of public speaking and I don't know anything about politics," and he's all, "It doesn't matter, none of it matters." Luckily, Reince had his huge nephew's suit on him and let me borrow it so I didn't look stupid up there. Reince's nephew is eight-feet tall and weighs 500 pounds. So it's mainly that -- that I truly just still don't understand what this job is or why I had it.
I also have not received a paycheck and every time I try to talk to Mr. Trump about it he screams "GO AWAY" at me.
Oh, absolutely not, no, I was very, very bad and that was obvious to everyone I think. I was insanely not good at this.
I would say bad? Yes, I think bad, very bad. Almost every day Mr. Trump would knock on my door and tell me that he wished I was never born. For the first few weeks I would laugh because I thought it was a silly thing to say and that he just had a dry sense of humor or something. He would see me laugh and he would say "No Sean, I mean it," and I would laugh harder and then he would say, "I am dead serious about this and I'm going to put the best scientists in the world on figuring out how to do it" and I would lose it. Then I saw him talking to a bunch of scientists in the oval office and he was asking them if it was possible to "Go back and make Sean not born," and I realized he was maybe not kidding around.
Wait, I managed people?
I liked riding around in the planes and helicopters, that was cool. If Mr. Trump was on the plane, though, he would make me go inside a big suitcase in the cargo bay and he'd kick the side of it until we landed.
The podium. I asked them again and again to please get me a new podium and they would always tell me no. Mine was all cut up and it would give me slivers every time I went up there. Just bad, old wood.
Also everyone started this joke that I looked like a sausage -- I don't think I look like a sausage but they all would call me "Sausage face" and "Sausage Boy" and "Mr. Salami" and would say "Nice casing, Sausage boy" if I wore a new suit. I tried to ignore it to make it go away but nobody ever stopped.
I think just really, anyone who hates poor people and is white and a man would be good.
Sorry if I'm being short. I only just found out an hour ago that The Lord of The Ringsisn't real.
I would highly recommend the job to anyone who likes being yelled at and thinks that being told to chug 20 Diet Cokes at a state dinner to "impress foreign dignitaries" sounds good. I loved it, and I will miss this place.
Since day one, I have set out to be remembered as someone who is very bad at what they do and I am proud of my work.
Thanks for reading Mashable Humor: original comedy every day. Or most days. We're people, just like you, and we're trying our best.
TopicsDonald TrumpPolitics
Visualizing July's astounding global temperature records2025-04-26 17:47
DeepTok is taking over TikTok with berries and cream videos2025-04-26 17:34
Samsung's Galaxy Watch 4 Series aims for an easy Apple2025-04-26 17:33
The rise of the childfree movement on TikTok2025-04-26 17:23
Mom discovers security cameras hacked, kids' bedroom livestreamed2025-04-26 17:03
Apple mounts iPhone on motorcycle after telling everyone not to do that2025-04-26 16:53
Woman celebrates her divorce by recreating Nicole Kidman's iconic divorce outfit2025-04-26 16:51
Danny DeVito gets his Twitter checkmark back after being temporarily unverified2025-04-26 15:37
We asked linguists if Donald Trump speaks like that on purpose2025-04-26 15:37
Unistellar's eVscope boosts citizen astronomy during COVID2025-04-26 15:33
One of the most controversial power struggles in media comes to a close2025-04-26 17:40
5 TikTok accounts to follow if your houseplants are dying2025-04-26 17:08
The FCC released a new broadband map that's actually pretty usable2025-04-26 17:00
Huawei's new smartwatch and tablet run on HarmonyOS, which looks very familiar...2025-04-26 16:59
Did our grandparents have the best beauty advice?2025-04-26 16:01
How to download Apple's iOS 15 developer and public betas2025-04-26 16:00
OnlyFans' sexually explicit content policy to take effect October 12025-04-26 15:53
14 coolest Tesla features that put your regular car to shame2025-04-26 15:47
What brands need to know about virtual reality2025-04-26 15:16
SpaceX Inspiration4 video has stunning orbit views and a floating alien cameo2025-04-26 15:14